Friday, August 21, 2015

Boy Moms and the Chicken Dance

Little boys are easy to buy gifts for- all it requires is hitting the Lego section of Target and selling a kidney to pay for it. Buying for bigger boys is a bit tougher. You will spend endless moments trying to find ingenious ways to wrap basketballs, hockey pucks, and baseball bats. Even Martha Stewart gets stumped at this stage in the game. No amount of hand stamped wrapping paper can help you camouflage those babies. But high school and college guys?? Those guys are in a league of their own. They are notoriously hard to shop for. How in the world do you find that magic gift that walks the line of cool/gross/funny/weird???  I'll tell you how. With my help, of course. Here are some of my favorites. Because I adore you, I've done all the leg work.  I've linked each one to the store's website because I'm all techie like that.

1. Boombox Bean Bag- Seriously, how cool is this? This would make the perfect guy gift for any occasion- graduation, birthday, Christmas - you name it. This is the kind of gift that shoots you straight to the top of the Cool Aunt List.

this would be rad!

2. T-Rex Taxidermy If an elk looks good on your wall, you can't tell me this doesn't look better. And bonus? No dinosaurs were harmed in the making of this product.

Glow in the Dark Nuclear Element Soap

3. Glow in the Dark Nuclear Element Soap- This gift falls into the "Hope Springs Eternal" category. Perhaps if the soap glows in the dark, maybe- just maybe - they will actually use it.

Schnoze Power

4. Schnoze Electric Outlet This gift scores super high on the gross/funny scale. You are so lying if you say your first thought wasn't "Holy Cow. That is so obnoxious and I totally want one."
5. Cool Daddy Nose and Ear Trimmer Just keeping it real here, folks. We all know wack-a-doodle nose hair is an issue with our guys. This hipster can help keep all that crazy under control. 

CLING BLING Our Window Solar Charger For Smart Phones And More

6. Cling Bling Solar Phone Chargers- Full Disclosure- this gift is techie but a bit utilitarian. You will definitely win points for appearing to understand the geek world. But if I were you, I would add a sticker on the back of this baby.  Maybe from their university or a band we old people have never heard of.

Beardski Pirate Ski Mask- Beardski

7. Bearded Ski Mask- This is the foolproof gift for any guy who snowboards or skis. My favorite version of this is the one with the red beard. What can I say? I've always had a soft spot for Gingers.

8. Carpe Diem Tshirt- If you have ever tried to buy a shirt for a teenage guy, you know why this shirt is a winner. 1) It is gray. 2) It has block letters. 3) Most importantly, it is gray.
ThinkGeek :: NERF Nuke- Each Nuke holds 80 micro NERF darts and shoots them (up to 30 feet) in all directions. Every Nuke also comes with a Launcher, which propels the WND (Weapon of NERF Destruction) up to 40 feet.

9. Nerf Nuclear Bomb- There is no way I can spin this. This gift is crazy expensive. It comes in at just 1 cent under $100. That being said, every guy you know will want one of these. Including your husband. As in yesterday. 

Parks and Recreation Ron Swanson Bobblehead

10. Ron Swanson Bobblehead- Do I really even need to explain this one? If you are a guy over the age of 14, you know who Ron is and he is your hero. And as a hero, he deserves a designated spot on their desk.

So there you go. Ten great choices for any high school or college guy in your life. Just a few more words of advice before I let you go. Number one, do not, under any circumstance, attach a mushy card to any of the above presents. This automatically eliminates any cool factor points you have gained in picking the ideal gift. Number two, when they look at you in awe after opening your present, try not to strut around like a chicken. Nothing kills the moment like a grown woman doing the chicken dance. No matter how cool she thinks she looks. Trust me on this one. 

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